Skip to content Skip to footer

‘Lion King’ cast looks cool and all, but WHERE DESUS AND MERO AT?

As you have probably already heard, Disney is releasing a Lion King remake in 2019.

To make sure the animated flick matches its worldwide box office earnings of $985.6 million back in 1994, Disney made sure the voice over cast was stacked AF.

Donald Glover will be playing Simba and Beyonce, Nala… but wait what is this? It seems as if there is an error. Seth Rogen and Billy Eichner will be playing Timon and Pumbaa.

I was lead on to believe that late night’s number one TV show hosts Desus and Mero were going to be the voices of Simba’s best friends.

We must figure this out. My first question is, ‘who the fuck is Billy Eichner?’ Some washed comedian who’s never done a voice-over before.

C’mon, how could Disney play the homies like this? Doesn’t Disney know that Desus and Mero are hot off the voice-over press? They just completed a dope anime series and killed it.

They didn’t even have to alter their voices for the characters in Neo-Yokio. It was natural. Congratulations Disney, you played yourself.

But let’s be real. I get the Seth Rogan casting selection. His resemblance to Pumbaa is unreal. Just never thought of Pumbaa as Jewish, Canadian, or white. Do they even have warthogs in Canada, eh? I know there is a possibility of warthogs showing up in the Bronx.

Plus, isn’t Rogen racked out already? Does he really need to do this? C’mon Disney put it on for the Bronx.

Disney, are you down like you said you were? Have you been lying to us our entire childhoods? I’m out here thinking that you were with the shits.

Disney, look at what you have done. Desus and Mero are lamenting on Twitter. They are sick (as are we) and you should’ve considered the dynamic duo for the role of Timon and Pumbaa.

Think about it. Do Rogen and Billy even chill? I doubt it. TBH Eichner looks whack AF. Who’s chilling with this man?

I’m on CONAN tonight at 11 on TBS! Talking ’bout #AHSCult and a lot more! Tune in!

A post shared by Billy Eichner (@billyeichner) on

Yooo! Disney, you are fucking up fam. This man isn’t with the trends. He looks like he’s been holding his fart in for way too long.

Listen, there is one way Disney could make this up. Cast Desus and Mero for the Dumbo remake.

We all know the secret Hollywood plan is to recycle your most popping movies and make even more guap than you did when they were first released. So, a Dumbo remake is definitely in the works.

All they are asking for is a small role.

That’s the only way you can settle this Disney. Stay bready.