White House staff says rats, cockroaches, and ants are taking over the crib

President Donald Trump’s White House is infested with roaches, ants, and cockroaches. No we’re not talking about his staff.

The vermin have been seen posting up smoking bogies in the Situation Room, the White House Navy mess hall, and White House chief of staff’s office.

This is all according to the hundreds of work orders obtained by NBC News 4 Washington.

Besides the pest problem, the work orders also revealed that Sean Spicer wanted to cop new furniture and the FLOTUS wanted a 60-inch screen TV in her office.

It’s like everyone in the White House is living in an illustrious trap house. They have big TVs, the finest of toilet seats, and the fire furniture with vermin hiding in the braziest places.

According to former GSA Inspector General Brian Miller, whose office formally managed the agency’s performance, the White House is grimy and constantly needs work done because it’s old as fuck.

“They are old buildings,” Miller said. “Any of us who have old houses know old houses need a lot of work.”

The agency records also indicate that they spend about $100,000 a year on maintenance costs for the White House. That’s a lot of dough to spend on an old ass crib.

Plus, it seems as if subcontractors, hired to handle all of the maintenance, are doing a trash job. Miller claimed that the General Services Administration, “hires contractors and subcontractors for the [maintenance] work. Then the agency must watch over the contractors.”

They ain’t watching close enough. Might as well just hire a pied piper because that’s one huge come up for any type vermin. Like, if you were a mouse would you dip? Hell nah, you made it to the big house.

Some poop for thought work orders also revealed that the Oval Office requested a new toilet seat.

The toilet seat request was made upon Trump’s inauguration. They GSA acted fast on that one. I guess Donald Trump’s monster dumps precede the vermin issue.