Are you scared? You should be because it’s Friday the 13th.
Black cats will cross you, mirrors will shatter because of your ugly ass face, and umbrellas will open above you while you’re inside.
The thought of bad luck is sickening, huh? Well if you are scared you should cop some piff and stay in your crib. That’s the only thing you should be doing today anyway.
But, being afraid can sometimes be a thrill. So, how are you going to keep your superstitious mind stimulated while you’re in the crib cooked off that good-good? By watching creepy ass movies on Netflix, stupids.
We’ve compiled 13 movies on this 13th day of the month that happens to fall on the unluckiest day of the week in the scariest month of the year.
Hopefully, this list will hold you down until Halloween. Boo! Let’s get it.
Eyes Wide Shut
Let’s get fucking weird.
A massive masked orgy that takes place in a secret society at a masquerade makes up this 1999 Stanley Kubrick film.
The erotic film is based on Arthur Schnitzler’s 1926 novella Traumnovelle Schnitzler’s novella takes place in Vienna. But Kubrick’s takes the early 20th century Vienna setting and places it in 1990s New York City.
Follow Tom Cruise’s character as he goes crazy trying to find the wildest sexual endeavor he can get himself into.
This movie was completed shortly before Kubrick’s death in March of 1999. Eyes Wide Shut was truly his masterpiece. Trust me when I say that this erotic thriller will have you on the edge of your seat for the whole movie.
Basic Instinct is a thrilling throwback released in 1992 and directed by Paul Verhoeven.
This is Sharon Stone and Michael Douglas like you’ve never seen them before. Stone’s character is scary sexy and Douglas’ inquisitive and weary. This combination of characteristics is actually terrifying and gripping AF.
Stone’s character, Catherine Tramell, is a suspect in a gruesome murder of a rock star. What’s so creepy? Tramell is being investigated because the murder is an exact replica of the murder she described in her novel.
As Tramell pens a new novel about a detective who falls in love with a murderer, the big question is, ‘Will Douglas’ character, homicide detective Nick Curran succumb to Tramell’s seduction?’
Get ready to shit your pants. Donnie Darko, directed by Richard Kelly, is a science fiction film that follows a troubled boy who has doomsday visions.
Donnie Darko came out in 2001 and for all its critical acclaim it didn’t do very well at the box office.
The film was scarcely advertised due to the fact that the film’s commercial featured a plane crash, which would have been too controversial at the time as the September 11 WTC attacks had just happened.
The movie was filmed over the course of 28 days. The filming timeline has a direct correlation with the plot as Jake Gyllenhaal’s character, Donnie Darko is visited by a mysterious rabbit monster named Frank who tells him the world will end in 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, and 12 seconds.
How Jake Gyllenhaal became Louis Bloom in Nightcrawler is beyond me. His character is a creepy, obsessive, and manic news cameraman.
Bloom will do whatever it takes to get a story that includes creating one. This Dan Gilroy-directed film literally embodies the old saying, “If it bleeds it ledes.”
What the Health
Nothing is scarier than real life.
Filmmakers Kip Andersen and Keegan Kuhn dig up dirt and uncover the detrimental health effects that consuming animal products has on the human body.
This documentary is making people reconsider their daily diet and turning them vegan. At least that’s what happened to my friend’s brother after he watched What the Health.
Watch as Anderson and Kuhn tell us what the world’s leading health organizations don’t want us to know. This is a must-see.
Let’s sew the bodies of three different girls together and watch them escape. Too gory and weird for you?
Well, that’s exactly what you’ll be watching once you click the Netflix play button on Patchwork.
Patchwork is the perfect movie for those of you who are fans of dark humor. The movie is a comedic version of Frankenstein . After going out for a night on the town three girls are disembodied and find themselves attached together both mentally and physically.
Definitely mind-boggling and disturbing at the same time.
The twist and turns this movie has really make it a magical experience. To prove it, The Prestige was directed by Christopher Nolan, the same visionary behind The Batman Begins and Memento.
The movie, which stars Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, and Scarlett Johansson, takes viewers to a more simple era. The era of magicians. Be entertained as you watch two magicians who start out as friends become the ultimate rivals.
Risky tricks will leave you with a bone-chilling vision of what was like to be an actual magician in the 19th century.
The Prestige is like being on a rollercoaster as they lay the track down, you never know which way the plot is going to go. It’s like a constant climax.
Directed by David Fincher, Zodiac is based on the investigation of the 1960s Zodiac serial killer.
The Zodiac Killer stalked his victims, wrote cryptic messages to taunt the authorities, and claimed to have killed 37 people.
Zodiac was never caught.
Let’s have a baby through another person, she said. The baby won’t grow into a demonic force that will haunt us all, she said.
Shelley is the epitome of a surrogate baby gone wrong. This film is guaranteed to leave your mind in the darkest state possible.
Make sure you sleep with the covers over your head because that’s the only way you’ll be getting any rest.
We all know that you can catch something like a curse if you have sex, but sheesh imagine if you actually caught a hex.
Director David Robert Mitchell really changed the game with this one. Follow a teenage girl as she tries to get rid of the worst STD known to man.
A supernatural entity that follows her around.
Raw is a carnivorous hazing ritual at vet school gone wrong. A young vegetarian is forced to eat meat and develops an appetite for human flesh.
This movie is the epitome of a creepy flick.
First They Killed My Father
This Angelina Jolie-directed film is based on the horrific accounts of Cambodian author and human rights activist Loung Ung had as a child during the rule of the Khmer Rouge.
The Khmer Rouge was ruthless and mad with power. They isolated the country from all foreign influences, closed schools, hospitals, and factories.
It doesn’t stop there the Khmer Rouge also abolished all forms of finance and outlawed all religions. On its own the regime massacred 25,000 Buddhists monks.
They forced people out of their homes and into farm labor. No one was allowed to even own private property.
This is some fucked up shit.
This is probably not your go-to film if you want to have the crap scared out of you, but Chasing Coral is guaranteed to leave its mark. It’s terrifying because it’s real.
Divers, cameramen, and scientists document the great mystery of the dying coral reefs. You will see huge coral reefs die or “bleach” because of warming oceans due to climate change.
It will leave you speechless, scared, and motivated to do something about a creature that sustains life in many different ways. You will never forget that you watched this film.
[WARNING: Most movies are rated R for Real AF.]