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Lunch Table Opinions: WTF were they wearing at the VMAs, son?

Remember walking over to your lunch table just to be bombarded by 5 other people waiting to cut your ass (or roast you for the non-New Yorkers)?

Whether it be your 5-year-old sneakers hitting the milly rock or your teeth doing the Harlem Shake, we’ve all been subject to Lunch Table Opinions – even celebrities.

Coincidentally, the MTV Video Music Awards aired last night and I couldn’t help myself from wanting to go in on everyone on the red carpet… so that’s exactly what I’m going to do now!

Don’t forget that the number 1 rule at the lunch table is to not get in your feelings, everything is in jest so let’s just have fun with this!



A post shared by Lorde (@lordemusic) on

Lorde looking like she murdered the whole muppet cast and stapled them to her dress, looking like Snuffleupagus’ eyelashes.

I just graduated, she looks like the Tassel on my graduation cap. Look like she’s holding in a mean ass sneeze, probably allergic to all that yak hair.

Lil Yachty

I think I’m cute… I know I’m sexy.. #vmas

A post shared by King boat (@lilyachty) on

Lil Boat looking like he came straight off the Lil Bus. My son captain of the S.S. Super Senior. He wearing someone else’s prescription glasses to look smart.

Looking like he about to blow on his imaginary cello face ass.

Kendrick Lamar


A post shared by DJ Akademiks (@akadmiks) on

Ole “If I gotta slap a pussy ass n**** ima make it look sexy” head ass. Kendrick my brother, it looks like you pimping a lot more than butterflies out here.

Look like he got all his old Reebok shoelaces in his hair. He ain’t know what to do with his left hand.

Katy Perry

She was just in her dressing room cutting her hair with corner store razors.

Somebody needs to call Billy Ray Cyrus, he’ll know how to fix this. She look like Ezio from “Assassin’s Creed.”

“The different earrings symbolize the yin and yang of sexuality” head ass.



A post shared by QuavoHuncho (@quavohuncho) on

My son happy as fuck, about to go do some more solo features. Quavo looks like my mother when she finally gets away from the kids. Two watches on still can’t tell time ass.

“Shit, I ain’t get left off Bad and Boujee.”

Kodak Black

I Jumped Up In This Rap Shit Gave It A New Meaning #ProjectBaby2

A post shared by Project Baby 2 (@kodakblack) on

Kodak, you know ain’t nothing playing out them headphones. That jacket got a big ass zipper, zipper for dummies ass jacket. Kodak is Florida personified.

21 Savage & Amber Rose

It’s all urs baby

A post shared by Amber Rose (@amberrose) on

21 ready to devour the soul of anybody who comment on Amber’s wig. They look like super villains, Doofenshmirtz and his daughter in the flesh.

I can’t even talk shit cause they look amazing and evil simultaneously.